It can be difficult to say the right words at a funeral when you know someone is mourning the loss of a loved one. You may wish to convey sympathy and support, but your words could come out and be perceived as the complete opposite.
Below, we discuss some common phrases that may seem like great things to say at a funeral, but should be avoided.
I know exactly how you feel
You may have lost a loved one before, but you should avoid saying “I know exactly how you feel” to someone who is grieving. This is because even though you may be familiar with loss and grief, no two experiences are exactly the same. You may understand the grief, but you really don’t know “exactly how they feel.” Instead, simply say something like “I am sorry for your loss.”
They are in a better place now
When someone has lost a loved one, don’t ever say “They are in a better place now.” This is because the person who is mourning believes the best place for their loved one is next to them, healthy, happy and alive.
You will feel better in time
It is often said that time heals all wounds, but when you're mourning the death of a loved one, this is not a very comforting thought. Loss can be overwhelming, and often, people don’t want to let go while they are still in the grieving stage. So instead of saying “you will feel better in time,” say something like “take your own time to heal and be gentle with yourself.”
You need to stay strong
At a funeral, the family and close friends of the deceased do not need to hear that they “have to be strong.” They need time and space to process the loss, to let all their emotions out, and grieve in a healthy manner instead of repressing their emotions just to put on a brave face.
Thanks for reading,