Although it may take some time to move on after the death of a loved one, it eventually happens. Many people find that they have a sense of guilt before they move on or when they move on, preventing them from ever really living their life again. This can be quite unhealthy for you in the long haul.
It is important to understand that after the death of your spouse, finding someone else isn’t wrong. It doesn’t mean you are betraying them. You have the right to carry on with your life and find someone who loves you for who you are. There is no right time to get married again after you have lost your spouse. It is crucial that you do it at your own pace, in your own time without any external pressure.
Here are some important things you should consider before making the decision:
You need to be prepared for a new marriage mentally and emotionally. After all, you will be the one who experiences the most change. Before making any decision, take the time to figure out where you stand and what you are looking for in a relationship. Understand that it is unfair and unhealthy to bring your unresolved issues and attachments from your previous marriage into your new one, unless you and your new partner can openly speak about it.
If you have kids from your previous marriage, you need to consider their feelings also. Your kids may not be ready to welcome a new member to the family, and often kids feel that when their parent remarries, the new spouse is trying to replace their deceased parent. You need to help your kids understand this isn’t the case.
Remarriage not only brings changes to your personal life, but your home and family traditions as a whole. You need to make sure that you are ready to welcome such changes.
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Many funeral homes offer a service performed on the body of a loved one who has passed away known as embalming. It is the process of preserving a body after death so as to delay decomposition. It also involves disinfecting the body and making it visually appealing for visitation by applying make-up.
For many years humans have been practicing embalming in various forms. Thousands of years ago, the Egyptians practiced it, and we still continue this today in different cultures and religion, although the forms may vary.
There are two main types of embalming, both differing in process. The first is called arterial embalming, where the blood in the body is replaced with certain embalming fluids or solutions. Blood will be removed through the veins, while the embalming solutions enter the body through the arteries. These solutions are usually a mixture of formaldehyde, ethanol, glutaraldehyde, phenol, ethanol, and water.
The other type of embalming is known as cavity embalming. Here, a small incision is made through which the natural fluids found in the abdomen and chest are drained. The embalming solution replaces the natural fluids, thus preventing early decomposition of the body.
Before the embalming process starts in both cavity and arterial embalming, the body is thoroughly washed with a disinfectant solution. To prevent any stiffness of muscles and joints, the body is also massaged.
Why is embalming done?
There are three main reasons why embalming is done:
The first reason for embalming is to preserve the body of the deceased so that it can be displayed longer for visitation, or if the burial is several days away.
Embalming restores the body of the deceased, making it more visually appealing.
Embalming is done so as to protect anyone coming in contact with the body, as well as to prevent any odor before burial.
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Funerals are an important ritual when a loved one has passed away. Many argue that there is no point in holding such elaborate rituals when someone is already dead, but what these people do not understand is that funerals are for the living, not for the dead. It is necessary that we have a positive reception of funerals so we can learn to respect and appreciate the role they play in our understanding of life and death.
Below we discuss a few points to help establish why funerals are for the living.
Funerals provide us with the proper time and space to say goodbye to our loved ones who have passed. This is one of the most important reasons why we have funerals – they serve as a ritual that helps us acknowledge that someone is no longer with us.
Since funerals provide us with a chance to say goodbye to those people we have lost, they also allow us to move on with our lives without them. Once we acknowledge our loss, it becomes easier to move on and start our lives without them.
Another important role of funerals is that they serve as a time and place for family, relatives, and friends to lend their support to each other and to those who are grieving. Since a lot of people from the community come together, it becomes easier to feel strengthened even amid loss.
As living beings who go on with our daily lives, we hardly think of profound topics such as life and death. However, it is important to reflect on these, so we know just how precious life is. Funerals allow us this time for reflection.
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It’s common practice for Christians to bury the dead in caskets, six feet underground. But have you ever wondered why? How did this funeral ritual develop? How did we bury the dead before the invention of caskets? Let’s take a look at a brief history of caskets and coffins.
Burial is among the oldest forms of funeral ritual in the world, and many cultures across the globe adopt it. In fact, it can be traced back to about 600,000 years ago, when the Neanderthals, living in Eurasia, used to bury their dead in shallow pits on the ground with a few of their personal items.
Fast forward to 3150 B.C, and you will find that the Egyptians were using advanced burial techniques to preserve their dead even during that time. It’s no wonder archaeologists today still find Egyptian mummies dating back to thousands of years, laid in decorated wooden or stone containers. Then, it was about 700 B.C, when the Celtic people in Europe started the practice of laying their dead in burial boxes constructed from flat stones instead of burying them directly in the earth.
Adopting modern encasements
From this progression, it is clear that as man evolved, burial practices and methods evolved also. Earlier, people did not cover the body before burying them. They believed that the body should be united with the earth once again. As time passed, boxes were made to keep the bodies in and this evolved to be what we know today as coffins and caskets.
The word “coffin” was coined by the French, which literally translates to “basket” or “cradle”. The word “casket”, on the other hand, was first used by undertakers in North America. When the civil war broke out, coffins were produced in bulks since so many soldiers died every day and this greatly catapulted the casket industry to where it is today.
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Losing a loved one is difficult. The experience is more difficult when people come up to you and start saying all the wrong things. If you want to comfort someone who is grieving, here are the four things you should never say to them.
"Everything happens for a reason."
This is a very common phrase that people often tell others during hard times. You may think that it may bring them some sort of comfort, but more often than not, it does exactly the opposite. When someone we love dies, we go through an overwhelming feeling of loss and grief, and we simply do not want to hear that losing someone you love “happens for a reason”, especially when the reason is unknown.
"I know exactly how you feel."
When someone is grieving, the most important thing is to let them know that you are there for them. It may seem like the right thing to say, but don’t tell them you know and understand exactly what they are going through, because you don’t. Yes, you may have lost a loved one too, but you can never know just how deeply someone is feeling a loss.
"What can I do for you?"
Don’t ask a grieving person what you can do for them, or to tell you how you can help. Instead, just do what you see needs to be done. They are already in a difficult place and asking them to reach out for your help only puts more responsibility on their shoulders.
It’s easy to say things like “At least he/she had a peaceful death”, “At least he/she lived a long life”, or “At least they are in a better place now.” Even though your intention is to make them feel better and comfort them, statements like these rarely do the work. No amount of “At least” can take the pain away.
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